March 2013: A Month of Strangers

I’m writing an early month-ender post just because I’m afraid we’ll be out of town the next few days. Actually I’m not really sure so I just decided to finish this one in case we do go somewhere. It’s holy week. You’ll never know what plans people could actually have in mind. :)

This month has been really way too fast. One morning I was telling myself, “Oh no it’s March already” and then the next thing I knew, it’s about to end! Seriously, is it just me and the whole review thing or this year is really like on fast-forward mode? Here’s a recap of the happenings this March:

Earlier this month, my cousins Van and Aezra celebrated their birthdays. They are not twins but they have the same birth month so their parents decided to just have it on the same day. What’s funny this year is that it was so grand that I almost can’t believe I was there. Hahaha! Nooo. I mean, remember those movies when you were still kids and you see those beautiful birthday parties?BeFunky_CrossProcess_1.jpgBeFunky_Instant_1.jpg

I never got to experience this kind of birthday party when I was young. Haha. The magician, those game booths, the free merienda stalls, and let’s include na rin yung strawberries. :p Tita Vien is from Baguio kasi so every occasion we have in their house, we definitely have strawberries. It was such an amazing birthday party that I’m so inspired by how my tito and tita continued to remain humble in spite of the abundant blessings they receive in life. Truly, God blesses those who are faithful in Him. Also, I love family occasions! I love having photos taken with my lovely cousins. I’m so blessed with a wonderful family. :)

I also had the chance to spend more time with Sheer whether to study or just to hang out. Funny how we both love BonChon so much that there was a time we ate there twice in a single week. Haha. And I was so happy that the cashier spelled my name right without even asking me. (Yes, I was so happy that I took a picture of it!) We even decided to meet up with Arnie when he was here in Manila for the oath-taking of new Architects. He gave us some tips for the board exam and of course “malokong-kwentos” that we were just laughing the whole time.BeFunky_CrossProcess_2BeFunky_CrossProcess_3.jpg

Also, my review class every Sundays eventually started but I’m glad that I was able to spend time with my FOM sisters. Hurray for the pictures! Please have our COC moved to Saturdays so I can join you guys!! I love these girls so much that they are ones who make my Sundays extra special. I also love how we seem to not be able to get along at first but look at us now! We have our own kabaliwan and how we cause the uproar over at Infinitea is just so funny and baliw. Okay. Too much baliw but I love FOM – the “no-judgement” group. Hahahaha. I won’t forget our new found snack this month: popcorn dipped with toyo. (Thanks Anding for the idea even though you never really liked how it tastes!)BeFunky_Instant_2.jpg

Lastly, if you have read my recent entry about my sudden “cold feet” regarding the board exams, I am obviously still doing my best to convince myself that I have to take it this June. It’s so frustrating. I have many what if’s and I have this fear of failing. Honestly, I don’t know how I will be able to take it if I fail. It’s just so hard that it reminds me of the instance that I did not graduate on time. But then I have to commit these worries to God and ask for His will to be done.BeFunky_Instant_3.jpg

If you’ll notice the pictures, I’m actually posting my review notes and reminders almost everywhere in the house. Hahaha! I have it on the dining chairs, the pantry, the walls and etc. Also, I have good news!! I can now wake up at around 9 in the morning! Yehheeeyyy!! I’m trying to set in my goal this April to move it to at least 6 or 7 am. I’m so happy and proud of myself. I can do this!

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Okay. End of recap. Now, if you’re wondering about my title for this month-ender post, here’s the reason why: It’s not actually about those strangers as in “unfamiliar people”, but those I can’t really consider as good “friends” because I don’t know them. It’s those people whom you have just met for like once or twice and some were probably the ones whom you never actually get to talk to in person. In short, those “strangers with memories”. Haha! I love how it sounds. “Strangers with memories”

March has been a “roller-coaster” month. My emotions were unpredictable. And if there’s one thing that I have learned about myself this month, that would be what my real love language is. Hahaha. I just realized that I’m the type of person who likes to be affirmed. No, not in a sense that I love attention or what. It’s actually more of, I want to know that I am valued or my presence is appreciated. I’m not really into gifts or material things. In fact, I love “words” more than those things. Now that sounds weird. Haha. But seriously, if I were to look back in my life, I can say that it is indeed true. I don’t care what you give me. I’m also not into hugs or kisses. I value more what you think of me. Like, am I helping you? Am I of anything worth? Do you appreciate my existence in your life? Are you thankful for our memories? Do you remember those precious moments we had together as much as I do?

I don’t know if the fact that I am a middle child is a big factor of why I am like this. I think somehow, it could be. Yes, I am a middle child and I have to admit that my personality of being a bit competitive is greatly influenced by that. I don’t want to feel that I am worthless. Who, in their right minds, would want that anyway? As I have mentioned, my emotions were so random and impulsive the past weeks. My mind is in so much clutter that I sometimes I tend to self-pity. There’s just so much in my head that all I can think of are the questions, “Am I too much?” or “Am I not good enough?” But then God is so good, he started to affirm me, one by one, through those set of strangers with memories.

I’m not going to write here who they are. Although I want to somehow thank them for being such a good source of encouragement, even though they have no idea what they have done for me. I just hope they can read this. It’s like I’m about to commit suicide but then I suddenly bumped into them and ta-dah! They saved my life! (It’s just an example guys. Don’t be paranoid. Hahaha.) Some of them were those people whom I thought never knew that I exist, (LOL) but then I was surprised that they actually know me. Some were good old “acquaintances” who can still remember me (Even if it’s my “mataray” and “suplada” personality that they actually remembered. But I tell you, that is not true. Haha!) Some told me that they are proud of me and thankful that I am their friend. But mostly were random people, merely pure strangers, thanking me and telling me that I inspire them in some ways.

These are not those people whom I expected to remember me or tell me such kind words. But it’s nice to know that somehow, they have valued me even if what we had was just a short “encounter”. It motivated me more to appreciate those people around me. The question of, “what if I didn’t treat these people nicely during our short encounters?” keeps ringing in my head. Well, I suppose that in one way or another, I have left something in their memories that is worth to be remembered. I’m so thankful how God used those strangers and my memories with them, to affirm me that I have worth, in such a very special way.

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